When last I wrote, baby girl was not to be ours. Fast forward two months and then she was going to be... again. The birth father had changed his mind and did sign the paperwork. However, the birth mom, still waiting to move forward, disappeared. Turned out that she had decided to better her circumstances while her Grandmother raised the baby. We struggled with anger only because we moved Heaven and Earth to meet the birth mom's requests and needs only to have her make other plans. Basically, we were put on indefinite hold. We were just the adoptive parents, our emotions didn't count anyway. But I digress. Fast forward another two months. Baby girl was now 4 months old, our contract with Angel Adopt was weeks away from expiring, and we were feeling the pressure of losing everything we had invested for the past two years. A third phone call about baby girl came and the drama continued. This time the birth parents wanted things a certain way. The problem was, no state would claim jurisdiction (long story). Our attorney moved Heaven and Earth this time but it wasn't good enough for the increasingly demanding birth parents. Their plans were less than honest ones and we simply could not go that route. The door to baby girl closed for good on a Friday in May. How I pray she ended up with a family who loves her and no longer uses her for selfish motives.
Three days later we got "THE" phone call. Our second son, Connor, was born in June and we held him in our arms when he was less than a day old. MIRACULOUS!!! Cameron and I had to spend two and a half weeks in Connor's home state due to all four of the family court judges deciding to take the same week off for vacation. Who does that? Chris had to head home due to work obligations so his Mother graciously stepped in to help me out. I was even more glad for her company when the birth family decided they needed to see Connor. The transition was understandably difficult for them and I dared not say "no." In my heart I understood what needed to be done but it didn't ease my fear. Because of the judges, paperwork had not yet been signed which would have allowed the birth family to change their mind. In early July, however, parental rights were officially terminated and after a final goodbye with the birth family we were homeward bound. Fourteen hours later I pulled into my own driveway and our lives as a family of four officially began.
Since that day, my life has been endless loads of laundry, early morning bottle feedings, late arrivals.... to just about everywhere, and post placement home visits. The final visit happens in just a week and then all paperwork can be submitted to the courts for finalization. Connor should be legally ours in every way by March. We can hardly wait!!!!
There is no longer an empty chair at our table. Woo Hoo!!!! Our lives feel full and blessed. Scarred too, though. This past adoption journey was not a positive experience. Rather it was two years of lows, stress, disappointments, heartaches, fears, worries, and (lest I forget) expensive expenses. None of these things are fun BUT they did have a positive side effect. No matter what Chris and I were struggling with, Cameron was hurting too. How do you explain the drama to a three/four year old? So, when Connor arrived something amazing happened. There have been no jealousies, sibling rivalry or acting out. No, Cameron was instantly the most protective, loving big brother one could imagine. He FINALLY had a brother and NOBODY was going to take that from him. From the moment of first introductions, Cameron has loved on, taught, played with, and helped out with Connor. Chris and I watch with amazement as these two brothers interact with one another. A beautiful sight to behold if ever there was one! Unless the good Lord says otherwise, we won't soon be repeating the adoption journey. Those days are done. But, as with labor, hearing our boys laugh and squeal in playful delight has made the past pains worth it.
As we say goodbye to 2013 and hello to 2014 I thank the Lord above for the amazing blessings in my life: a wonderful Husband who loves me even at my worst (I love you Chris), an almost five year old son who amazes me every day with his youth and vigor, and a six month old son who lights up every day with a smile first thing. Yes, my treasures are priceless and I am SO thankful for the gifts in my life!!!
